Like many Americans, we'll have a new Congressman in January. The last guy got voted out, so it isn’t like this one got voted in. If he’d been in, he’d be out and the other guy would be in, which may happen two years from now when we get to do it all over again, if most of us want to, which we probably do.
Anyway, now The Post has to present its position on short-selling to another Representative. That means unleashing Queezhis on him. Queezhis Nadsoff, prominent litigator for some of the wealthiest serial connubializers in St. Paul, is our lobbyist. Woman knows what to go after when dealing with men. Has a knack for it.
Rub was freshly ensconced in his just-availed Capital Hill offices when Queezhis grabbed him by the sconces one day last week. Rub BerDucky is the new guy we were just telling you about.
“What’s your stand on short-sellers, BerDucky?” Queezhis inquired, putting the squeeze on real good.
“What’s yours?” Rub managed to kind of squeak out.
“$#&! ‘em.” Her Prominence was eyeball to eyeball now.
“That’s mine too,” Berducky whispered, nodding in agreement. Carefully.
“All of ‘em?”
“Oh, yeah.”
People think lobbying is about money, and most is, but there’s this other side too. Rub Berducky should be grateful he found out what that’s all about before the first actual day on the job.
Anyway, you can understand the soon-to-be Congressman’s relief to find himself on the right side of this one, and all of us at The MacDougal Post join our valued readers in welcoming him aboard.
You can also understand why we hired a lobbyist living 800 miles away. Article One in the Nadsoff employment contract is a restraining order stipulating that Queezhis never comes within 750 miles of Worldwide Headquarters down home here in Logano, Tennessee, especially when negotiating fees.
Haven’t actually met Her Prominence up close and personal yet, and we’re more than delighted to keep it that way.
